Let me tell you about a day that totally threw me off my game. You know those days where everything is planned out, and you’re feeling excited, only for something unexpected to happen and knock you sideways? Yep, that was me. Something happened with my son that left me feeling surprised, embarrassed, and completely powerless. I won’t go into details for privacy reasons, but I’m sure you’ve been there in your own way.

It left me thinking about how we, as special needs moms, can support ourselves in these tough moments. This is where self-care in advance comes in. Now, I know that phrase might sound obvious, but hear me out! Self-care in advance means planning ahead to take care of ourselves before things get hard—whether it’s an IEP meeting, medical appointment, or just the everyday chaos of life.

When we’re in the middle of a stressful situation, it’s easy to default to the “now brain” that just wants comfort and quick fixes. That’s when we need our “architect brain” to step in. The architect plans for the long haul and helps us make choices that support us in the future. For example, after a long day, it might mean planning an easy dinner or taking something off your schedule the next day to give yourself some breathing room.

Here are a few quick tips on how to plan self-care in advance:

• Plan simple meals for the week if you know you’ve got a busy few days coming up.
• Clear some time for yourself after big events like medical appointments or IEP meetings.
• Ask for help—whether it’s having your partner handle dinner or arranging for someone to watch the kids for a bit so you can decompress.

Honestly, it’s not always easy. I’m right there with you trying to figure it out, but when I give my “architect brain” a chance to plan ahead, I feel a little more prepared for those unpredictable moments.

If you’re looking for more support in this area, I’m excited to tell you that my Pathway to Peace coaching community is open! It’s designed specifically for moms like us who need that extra support to prioritize our own well-being.

And don’t forget—you can now text me directly with your thoughts, ideas, or questions! I love hearing from you all and sharing what works (or doesn’t) on the show.

Take care of yourselves, friends, and remember: we’ve got this, even on the hardest days.

Listen here!

See you in the episode,

Kara